After my morning class today, I packed up my bags and went to the Sauder library as usual (I say that even though I’ve only done this for slightly over a week). Had 2 hour break, might as well burn some time on Reddit doing work. I decided it was time to leave after I had read the top 200 posts on /r/all, and left the library for class.

I saw Alexander on the way out. It’s not like I haven’t seen him before at the library, in fact the only time I’ve ever seen him so far has been at the library.

We talked – normally.

That was key.

During the last few weeks of summer, Sean and I 3rd or 4th wheeled for Bob&Sarah (no spaces because they are one) at the movies. On the way to, we started to talk about our classmates, where they were now, who was doing great, who was doing okay, unexpected success, expected successes and the like.

We first went about Jimmy, then Eric, a little bit of Eugene, and then Bob. I think we both agreed we expected Bob to do well – academically – and that his lovey-dovey diabetes-inducing relationship came from left-field. Geez, Bob.

Then we got to Alexander. The way Sean talked about him made Alex out to be this professional, network-heavy, career-focused, and successful individual. It made me scared. It felt like he had radically changed or something, and had become one of those business-kids whom you can tell will be successful just by talking to them.

It changed a bit of how I interacted with him over text the next few weeks. To be fair, I primarily talk to him in person face-to-face, so I wasn’t acquainted with how he types. But my belief that he had changed & of his success made me act as if I was talking to a superior. It felt really weird, and it didn’t feel like the friend I had known since Chinese school. Honestly, it became kind of like a work-related thing to talk to him.

I slightly realized how I was treating him when he texted me:

You owe no one anything.


Here is the guy that brags super hard about his marks, and tries to make others suffer so he can gloat more.

And he just said that.

I didn’t know what to feel but – wow.

Then today I talked to him.

Like normal.

Like it was in grade 11 and we were waiting for Psychology so Ms. Patton could destroy our hopes and dreams.


I’m not saying he didn’t change – everyone did. He did change. His dress style, his attitude, and his care for school.

But it was still him.

I perceived a change in him, and acted different because of it. Yet the only change I noticed in our friendship was because of me, because of something I thought had happened.

Reminds me a bit of a Hearthstone podcast I listened too.

They talked a bit about how if they changed the rating of a card on their site, people would be lead to believe the card is strong, making the card actually played much more, even if it wasn’t strong. In turn, the meta of the game would change due to the change in perception of what is strong. It’s just another example of how changing a little bit of your thought can change a lot more in the overall picture.

I guess I should be glad that I met him today, wouldn’t have fixed my error as soon.

Things haven’t really changed, just the perception.