Fiction makes reality look so easy.

I guess part of me is extremely jealous of fiction. It never seems to work that brilliantly or beautifully for me.

But I can’t say I put in as much effort as characters in fiction. I’m not setting myself up for the success that characters in fiction achieve.

Which makes me upset.

Characters in fiction always make things seem so easy.

It’s easy to study. You just open the book and focus on it for a day or two.

Never happens like that in reality. Reality never lets you completely focus on your studies. There are always those side thoughts of things you wish to achieve, things you want to do now, and things you should do. Thoughts of going to relax and playing a game. Thoughts of going and getting a snack to eat. Thoughts about how your desk isn’t clean. Thoughts about what you want to do in the future. Thoughts about things you regret doing in the past.

Never a thought about the thing I should be doing.

Not only that, I’m jealous at how they can always find the right words to say.

An old song I used to really love comes to mind.

I need a little more help than a little bit,
Like the perfect one word no one’s heard yet.
‘Cause every time that I try I get tongue tied,
I need a little good luck to get me by this time.

I can never find the right words to say. The words to clearly present what I am trying to say, the goal I want to achieve, the purpose of what I am doing.

None of it comes. I’m still searching for the perfect words to say. It’s so frustrating when compared to fiction. What the characters say always has a clear purpose, a clear message. even when it ambiguous, there is a discernible purpose for what they’re saying.

It’s never like that in reality. Sentences are hard to form, goals are hard to explain and purposes fade away into the shadows.

The shadows of eloquent speakers.

Speakers able to properly communicate what they want to say. Able to reveal their feelings, thoughts and inspirations nicely and succinctly. They don’t stumble on their words, reform sentences they are in the middle of saying, or easily go off topic.

It is more than embarrassing to not be able to clearly communicate your thoughts during key moments. It is easy to say great things when it doesn’t matter and never is when it does.

Fiction makes it seem so easy.

Or is it that reality makes it seem so hard?