Today (by today I mean a day a few weeks ago) was a good day, for several reasons.

1. Finished with BUS272.

2. I felt knowledgeable! During the last presentation for 272, a question about stress&health popped up and all I could think of was ‘Whitehall’.

3. The researcher for my Psych research participation was hot (his voice was soothing)

4. Saw a cute girl wearing SnK hoodie.

But it wasn’t all good.

Today I could have spoken up multiple times.

I think I had three times today.

And three times I failed.

The first time was during the last BUS 272 presentation.

Someone (Alvin) asked about stress and if there was a correlation to illness. I thought of Whitehall, and wanted to share, but I was hesitant.

I wasn’t sure of my facts (they were correct). Nor the date (in hindsight, this really didn’t matter). Nor if it was even relevant to the question, since the Whitehall study was about hierarchy (it was relevant).

After the presentation, I promised myself I’d tell Alvin this if I saw him.

I didn’t see him.

And regret kicked in.

Somethings come, and somethings go.

 

Got my regretful ass up the mountain to Burnaby campus and began finding the room for my psychology research participation.

3:25 appointment, but I thought it was 3:30. Show up a few minutes late – not a great impression.

The experimenter was also hot as hell.

Not a good first impression.

I really wanted to just talk with the guy, but coupled with me being some awkward potato, being late, and him being busy with actually doing some work, just made me shut up.

Did the experiment, joked about the computer running windows 2000, and made some small talk. None of which particularly lasting.

Got my 2% and left.

 

Waiting for the bus down Burnaby mountain and it was starting to rain – fun.

Pull out the umbrella that is always in my bag and wait for the 145 to bring me to heaven – somewhere with a roof.

Get off the skytrain station at my stop and pull out the umbrella again to wait for the 410. More waiting, exactly what I like on a Thursday afternoon.

I’m not sure I can even still call it an afternoon at 5:30.

Well the line was pretty long, 410 must have not shown up in some time. Well, I guess that means:

1. Huge line.

2. Multiple buses arrive together.

Not too bad, I guess. I didn’t have anything to do anyways.

So with that realization, I settled in as best as I could while  waiting in a line in the rain.

A young girl (probably like 9th grade? I can’t tell anymore) in a green hoodie waited behind me. Something about the hoodie was familiar…ah.

It had the Survey Corps’ logo from Shingeki no Kyojin on it. No wonder it was familiar.

Bored in the rain, I just wanted to talk to someone (haven’t done the face to face conversation in some time), and here’s this opportunity for me to talk to someone who at least likes SnK, something ‘relevant to my interests’.

But hey, I still haven’t changed that much. Not only could I use SnK as an icebreaker, there was also the fact that it was raining and that she didn’t have an umbrella.

I could just as easily ask ‘Would you like to share an umbrella?’ and it would be fine.

But obviously I’m too god damn scared to say a word.

Instead I just do the awkward thing of moving closer to her and moving the umbrella slowly over her as well. But the trick here is to not make it look like you’re sharing, so it’s gotta be in this fucking terrible gray area. In which it benefits really no one.

After like 2-3 minutes, which felt like an hour, of awkward gray-zone umbrella sharing, the girl moved towards me a bit and it looked like it was just normal sharing. No more gray area shit.

Too bad I still didn’t say a word.

We ended up on the bus together, but I just move to the back, while she sat in the front.

Opportunity wasted!

Kinda regretful about it.

Could have made a new friend, or acquaintance.

It’s not the first time there was an easy opportunity there and visible that I failed to step up and take.

It wasn’t even the first time today.

I don’t want to miss more chances.

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