It’s the day of love, or the lack of it.

But for me today, it was neither.

Our school sells Valentine Grams for somewhere between $1.50 to like $4. It depends on if you want the gram/card to come with a rose, chocolate or both.

You can draw a picture on the side (it’s recommended actually) and write a message on the other side.

Multiple designs are available if you like variety.

And if you don’t like any of ’em…. tough luck.

They sell it under the impression, or the supposed impression, that one will send the card to someone they care for/love/like/etc. I’m not sure if they planned for almost all the cards sent to a friend, by a friend, to make them embarrassed and put ’em on the spot.

‘Trolling’, I’d call it.

However, they are certain cards (I saw one today) that had a legitimate important or personal message, and was not read out loud (they do that to all your cards). Oh, there’s also an option to instruct the delivery of the message. Either by rapping, dramatic reading, song, or whatever else a creative mind could think of.

But honestly, it’s just to make it more enjoyable.

It’s my last year at this school. Last year with these people, these teachers, and possibly, these kinds of events.

When the second card was being read out to my class, I suddenly regretted not sending one myself.

Not because there was a message I wanted to send someone, that I wouldn’t say to them in person (actually, there is, but that’s not the point!), but more because I’ve never sent  one before.

Suddenly, I regretted not ever participating in the school’s Valentine Gram sale. As well as the four other ones I’ve experienced, but did nothing about.

I felt that I had not supported school events, and hadn’t taken all the experiences I could have had.

It felt horrible.

There’s this message for highschoolers, that these are the few years where you should really enjoy school (but they say that about elementary and university too), and not be focused completely on your future, as it’s not the be-all-end-all.

I’d like to agree.

All these things I’ve missed so far, ranging from attending school dances, One Act plays, Christmas grams, Valentine grams, King of Hearts, Queen of Spades (Not sure what it’s called…), festivals, clubs, sports, teams,  groups, food, fundraisers, and more makes me feel sad.

It’s as if I’ve missed a large part of highschool’s offerings.

Even if I sent a fun message to a friend, or a real message, or a card to someone sent by someone else, it would have been okay. But I didn’t.

When I went to look at the cards on Wednesday, I should have just flat out bought one.

Hindsight sucks.

Why is Hindsight 20/20, and not my actual sight.

Oh right.