Google is extremely useful, just a few taps on the keyboard, and the information I need appears.

But sometimes that usefulness is scary.


This is why I don’t google personal problems.

How scarily correct they are.

How I already knew them, but just refused to believe.


Way to hit it home.

Out of the 8 steps/tips/whatever, each of them is something I already know about.

I just can’t accept it.

I can’t help it, internet. I always end up following 1,3, 5, 6, 7 and 8.

2, I already fixed. That was the simple one, I already do it often enough that it becomes instinctive.

But the rest, ack.

Especially all the ones not 3 and 5.

Fear, image, confidence, security, trust.

Fear – Of course I’m afraid. Why wouldn’t I be?

Image – Hah, such a joke.

Confidence – Non-existant.

Security – The result from the two above.

Trust – Been broken so many times before it’s not even remotely funny.

But the issue of trust is…. fun, I guess.

Let me be honest, I do not trust anyone.

Myself included.

Hold up, it’s not that everyone is untrustworthy, it’s because I cannot trust.

When people break it on a daily basis, there’s no real point in having it is there. Further experience from other people just helps to solidify that.

The last person I trusted was… Kevin Y. I think that was back in grade…. 2?

Then again, he might have been the only person I truly trusted at all. And thus, the only one who got to break it.

You know how people say innocence is better than being corrupt? I disagree. Being innocent is to be ignorant to society. Ignorance may be bliss, because you have zero clue of what is going on, but that doesn’t mean it does not happen to you. Being innocent is asking for trouble to come to you. You don’t know the dangers, and cannot prepare for them. This results in those dangers getting you.

This isn’t good at all.

I don’t know how 2knowmyself.

I think I’m going to stop, I don’t want to cry again. Never again.

Nothing good ever comes out of that, so might as well never let it happen.

Hah, that’s one of the things they said. Pushing their problems away and blaming external factors.

I’m already blaming external factors, and reading more just to find such things.

I’ve already found something that blames my parents, my friends, childhood, attitude, behavior and standards.

My god, I feel like such a worthless wreck right now, I should just sleep.

Hah, avoiding the problem – yet again.